It was to be a landmark year and it started off well enough then it all came crashing down and years from now we will look back and say ‘I survived 2020’. At least those of us who did survive it will say so.
Many haven’t. As I write this, over 1.8 million didn’t make it past the year, 500 of whom were Malaysians. The vaccines are still months away for most so these counters won’t stop ticking over for some time yet. Perhaps at this time next year there will be quite a few people still who will say ‘I survived 2021’.
Casting my eyes back though, and ignoring for a moment the metaphorical mass of the pandemic continuing to gallop along in a deadly chase, I do see that collectively as a people we have actually progressed. If nothing else, the crisis has exposed many flaws, lies and misconceptions, and stripped bare many images we have had of ourselves and the people around us.
America has probably been the most surprising - oh how the mighty have fallen!. That shining beacon of freedom and liberation denuded to reveal a framework of insatiable greed and shameless selfishness. Decades of Hollywood-fed images of bravado and derring-do cast aside as people could not only not survive a nuclear holocaust in their personal bunkers, they could not even handle breathing through a few thin layers of fabric.
OK, others much more eloquent than I have written about all that, so let me not walk in the shadow of those giants but instead trudge through a field of my own memories and pick out some of the things I have learnt, highlight some of the events that were significant, and mention some of the people who have made an impact on me in the last 12 months.
Here are some of my more significant memories of 2020.
A Different Chinese New Year
We decided to go down to Singapore for this new year. Mei’s dad was getting on and we thought it would be good if we spent this one with him. And we did, and had a great time. Mark, Megan and Michael were with us too - Megan being the big and very happy surprise as I had not seen my daughter in 2 or 3 years.
The first day of Chinese New Year was unforgettable. Not only were we, and Mei’s siblings and their families there, but for the first time in many years other relatives turned up all at the same time so we could even grab a huge family picture.
The old guy was visibly happy and that was very nice to see.
It was the last time we saw him in person as he became very ill just a few months later, had an operation, failed to recover well, and then was gone.
We could not travel down due to the travel restrictions. At the time both countries required a 14-day home quarantine and we had no suitable place in Singapore, and Mei would not have been given permission to return to Malaysia anyway. So we could not be near as he went for his op, and could not even attend the wake and funeral. We instead had to make do with pictures sent by Mark and Michael who attended and were kind enough to think of us and to send us our only visual link with the proceedings.
The last holiday of the year, at the beginning of the year.
Well, OK maybe it wasn’t quite the last one but it was a big one. My Australian nephew Ashley got himself married in February and they had a Malaysian do as well as their Aussie one, as his wife CY had some family connections here. So the whole lot of them turned up in KL just as some of us did in Sydney the year before for niece Charmaine’s wedding.
My brother Joe and his wife Hilda also trooped up to Penang to spend a few days here afterwards, as did my aunt Marianne (we call her Lai Koo as she’s the youngest sister of my late father) and my sister Margaret. Mei and I were thus busy running around taking them to see some sights, eat various local dishes and generally have a good time.
Mei and I had been in KL for the wedding and we drove back to Penang with Lai Koo and Margaret. The two ladies were pretty excited at the prospect of a ‘Road Trip’ even if it only took a few hours. And of course Mei and I were happy to play host in Penang.
I’ve always been rather fond of my father’s youngest sister, and also of my own eldest sibling of course. The two are separated in years by just a little more than Margaret and I are, actually. And we all 3 share an artistic streak. Lai Koo and Margaret are both into quilting and were responsible for the beautiful and meaningful quilt I received in KL. This amazing piece was made from clothes worn by, or just material used by, my father, my mother, my aunts Marianne (Lai Koo) and Helene, my nieces Meilian and Melanie and Margaret herself too. The batik backing is from Lai Koo and the binding (the trimming piece) bicycle pattern was a brilliant personal touch.
It’s not often that I receive such a deeply meaningful and personal gift and I was - and still am - very grateful indeed for the many hours of work that went into this.
Taking family around, on the other hand, has never been hard work. Indeed it was an immense pleasure and I enjoyed not just taking Lai Koo and Margaret around but also getting to know my aunt a little better.
A few short weeks later, the Movement Control Order came into play and we were all stuck at our respective homes and Margaret had gone back to hers in Switzerland. Lai Koo was back in KL and at one point stressed out because her grandson was suspected of having contracted Covid-19. An anxious few days followed before it turned out the test had returned a false positive and the young man was cleared. During those few days though, Lai Koo and I were exchanging messages regularly and it was nice to be able to offer some comfort in difficult times.
Isn’t that one of the things family is supposed to be there for?
